Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Yes, Michigan Is #5 -- And Here's How

The way I see it, the pre-season college football pollsters got it right. They rarely do, because how can you legitimitely rank teams that haven't played a game yet? But this time they were spot on.

Those pollsters had Michigan ranked #5. And they were right. U-M is, indeed, #5. I say that despite the two opening losses -- to Appalachian State and Oregon, both at home. I say that despite the fact that the team started poorly in Week 1 and got shockingly worse in Week 2.

The Wolverines are the fifth-best team, alright -- in the state of Michigan.

Certainly you can't put them ahead of Michigan State. The Spartans are 2-0, and despite a mild scare from Appalachian State-wannabe Bowling Green (who beat Minnesota in Week 1) last Saturday, the fact of the matter is that they're undefeated and that puts them far ahead of Michigan.

You can't put U-M in front of Grand Valley State, either. The Lakers are 1-0 and ranked #1 in Division II. They have been a powerhouse in the thumb area for years now.

Don't slot Michigan ahead of Central Michigan. The Chippewas are 1-1, and that's one game better than the Wolverines.

And, finally, though it's rare, you can't even say U-M is better than the Lions, who are 1-0 and looking like they could give Appalachian State quite a tussle -- maybe even beat them.

So there you have it -- U-M is the fifth-best team, and is struggling to fend off 0-2 Western Michigan and Eastern Michigan for #5 honors.

You might think this is oozing with sarcasm and cynicism, but is it fair to put any of those four teams behind Michigan in terms of anything other than disappointment on the grandest scale? If it's wrecked, ruined seasons and national humiliation that are your categories, then yes, U-M is #1 in the land. No one is even running a close second right now -- not even Notre Dame, the next team set for an Ann Arbor football date, who is also 0-2 and is playing such bad football that even their coach agrees with a victory guarantee made against his team.

U-M running back Mike Hart made one of the emptiest victory guarantees in recent memory when he boldly predicted a Michigan triumph over Notre Dame, in the aftermath of the Oregon Ducks' demolition of U-M, 39-7, on Saturday. That declaration had about as much resonance as an MRI of his team's heart. (OK, now THAT was oozing sarcasm).

Anyhow, ND coach Charlie Weis had no problem with Hart's guarantee.

"After watching the first two weeks of film, I'd maybe say the same thing myself," Weis said, oozing witty candor.

Will Michigan move up in the state polls this week? MSU hosts 2-0 Pittsburgh, so maybe there's hope there. Grand Valley is, like I said, #1 so they should win again. CMU is at Purdue, so that might be U-M's best chance to leapfrog someone. The Lions are at home, and they'll be fired up -- and will probably even win.

Here's my prediction after the dust settles Saturday:

1. MSU
2. GVSU
3. Lions
4. U-M
5. CMU

The sad thing? Moving Michigan up to #4 is almost like a pity vote. Hell, it is.

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SPOOKY CURSE?

I thought that this should be mentioned, though I'm hardly the first one to point it out.

U-M is 0-4 after Bo Schembechler's death on the eve of the Ohio State game last November.

Clearly, this is a coincidence, right? I mean, it's not like Bo would have wished anything ill on his school, like some other famous sports curses. So it's not a curse in that regard. But it is, I don't know, kinda spooky, don't ya think?

I think so.

Weird.

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