After Just One Week, The Lions Have Already "Accomplished" A Lot

In 1969, the Pittsburgh Steelers opened the season with a rookie head coach, at home, and were coming off a hideous 1968 season in which they went 2-11-1. Their opponents? The Detroit Lions. The result? The Steelers won, 16-13.

But then the Steelers went on to lose the remaining 13 games on their schedule. And the Lions regrouped to finish 9-4-1. The rookie Steelers coach? Just someone named Chuck Noll.

Now, I don't mean to say that the Atlanta Falcons will go 1-15 (although the Carolina Panthers did that a few years back, with a rookie QB in tow, after winning on Opening Day) -- and I ESPECIALLY don't mean to say that the Lions will finish 11-5 or something wacky like that. I just mean to point out that, as usual, just when you think that the Lions have done something new in the negative column, turns out that in their inglorious past they already did it.

Yesterday, the "new and improved" Lions defense made rookie QB Matt Ryan and his running back tandem of Michael Turner and Jerious Norwood look like, well, Noll's combo of Terry Bradshaw, Franco Harris, and Rocky Bleier during the Steelers' heyday.

But I doubt that any of the Steelers' opponents in the 1970s ever tackled as atrociously as the Lions did in Atlanta.

It was beyond annoying, or even beyond "the same old Lions". It wasn't even funny. It was disgusting and embarrassing. The Lions have done this before, too -- made pedestrian running backs look like Jim Brown. But never have they done it with such a feeble effort as was witnessed in the Georgia Dome. It was a nightmare, watching Turner and Norwood cut through the Lions like a hot knife through butter.

It's funny, but despite the Lions' woes in the Matt Millen Era, they entered yesterday with a 4-1 record in their five previous openers. And we all know how those years have turned out -- which is also why the Falcons and their fans should be careful before they anoint Ryan and think that 2008 is going to be "their year." After all, they beat the Lions, not the Cowboys.

Still, the Lions were supposedly going to win this game, and not necessarily because they were 4-0 in the preseason. They are supposed to be, simply, the better team. Not all that much better, but better. And certainly not bad enough to fall behind the Falcons 21-0 before 1:30 in the afternoon.

But that's exactly what the Lions did, and despite a gallant second quarter comeback -- a quarter in which they did not abandon the run, a la Mike Martz -- the hole was too big. Kind of like the holes Turner and Norwood found as the Lions' front seven put up as much resistance as balsa wood.

So here we were, barely 20 minutes of football into the new season, and the Lions are down 21-zip and there's QB Jon Kitna getting into it with receivers coach Shawn Jefferson. I mean, really getting into it. Made me think of Buddy Ryan socking Kevin Gilbride in the face in Houston, back in the day. But, we were told, this sort of thing happens all the time, and so it was no big deal. It just happened to be played out in front of the TV cameras. But the TV cameras are everywhere anymore, and I don't recall seeing that kind of display on a weekly basis. Whatever. But maybe Kitna and Jefferson should squabble more often; post-blowup, the Lions went on a 14-0 run.

Week 1 is in the books, and already the Lions have: a) made a rookie QB look as comfy as a puppy snuggled in a box in a blanket; b) turned two average RBs into Harris and Bleier; c) given a rookie head coach his first win; d) had in-fighting on their sideline; e) experienced yet another Dan Campbell injury (hamstring); f) cast aspersions on coach Rod Marinelli's "kind of players"; g) had one of their front-line players insist the team isn't that bad (Cory Redding).

Ahh, Redding. Quoting him, Redding said, "Don't be writing us off yet. We're good. We just didn't show up."

Great! Opening Day and the team is already not showing up. I feel much better now, Cory -- thanks!

Next up: the Packers, who are likely to come into Detroit and cheese whiz all over the place.