Monday, December 19, 2005

The Cincinnati Bengals: The Kid Who Wore The Dunce Cap Is Now The Teacher

A few years ago, the following statement would have been considered ludicrous: You can learn a thing or two from the Cincinnati Bengals.

Not anymore.

Oh, you could have learned from the Bengals between 1991-2002, actually, if you wanted to learn how to draft poorly, how to run a cheap organization, how not to pick head coaches, how to create apathy among your fans, and how to be mocked by the rest of the league and by football fans across the country.

But now that curriculum remains the sole possessor of the Detroit Lions. Bad Football 101.

The Bengals have switched departments, however, and now can hold class on How To Turn Things Around, led by Professor Marvin Lewis.

If the Lions want to do any sort of homework at all, any kind of research that might, MIGHT make them a winning organization, then they should look no further than southern Ohio, and the rather quick resurgence of the Bengals.

The Bengals clinched the AFC North yesterday with a systematic destruction of the Lions, 41-17. Someone from the Free Press picked the game 40-10. I want that guy at the blackjack table with me. Anyhow, this will be the Bengals’ first playoff appearance since the 1990 season. The division was called the AFC Central in those days.

But what burns me about the Lions -- even though I am desensitized enough now to chuckle at their ineptitude -- is that other teams seem to be able to get it together, sometimes several times over, after long stretches of failure, like the Bengals’ recent troubles. The Bears are doing it, with Lovie Smith. And so are the Bengals, under Marvin Lewis, who is just in his third season as head coach and has already won 27 games. The Lions have won 20 games since 2001.

Both Smith and Lewis, it should be pointed out, are African-American head coaches in a league that hasn’t exactly been a beacon of progressive light in that regard. But that’s another blog entirely.

The Bengals, who had worn the nickname The Bungles like a dog collar for most of the 1990’s and into the 2000’s, hired Lewis before the ’03 season, around the same time they drafted quarterback Carson Palmer out of USC. Two 8-8 seasons followed, leading into 2005, a season in which the Bengals are 11-3 and considered a team no one wants any part of in the playoffs.

So what did the Bengals do that was so nifty? What was the magic elixir they swallowed to turn themselves from ugly ducklings to beautiful football swans?

Well, there was Lewis, for one, the Baltimore Ravens’ defensive coordinator and the guru behind the team’s Super Bowl XXXV win over the Giants. And Palmer, for two. But the ownership hadn’t changed, and Mike Brown, Bengals owner, was perhaps even less popular than Bill Ford in Detroit. I don’t purport to know all the answers, nor do I intend on launching into a dissertation about what the Bengals have done and how they’ve done it. All I know is, something clicked for them. Something turned that franchise around 180 degrees. And if I were the Lions, I’d be very curious to find out what it was.

The optimistic part of Lions fans wants to say, "Hey, they did it in Cincy -- a city whose NFL franchise was considered the absolute dregs of the league for about a decade -- why can’t they do it in Detroit?"

Well, that’s an oft-asked question, of course, but I think the Bengals just may provide the Lions with a useful model as to how to answer it. I’d look into Lewis himself -- his style, his philosophies, his organizational skills, his relationship with his players. I’d look into the recent drafting history of the Bengals. I’d look into where they patched their roster with free agents. I’d look into how they developed Palmer.

Yes, I’d do all that and I would be proud to announce publicly, "We’re going to pattern ourselves after the Cincinnati Bengals and return the Detroit Lions to championship caliber."

The Bengals put on a clinic yesterday, once again turning the passing game of a Lions’ opponent into no-contact drills. Palmer had way too much time to throw. And the Lions continue to throw three-yard passes when they need six.

When the Cincinnati Bengals are now schooling you, it’s situation critical.

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