Monday, November 02, 2009

Lions Serve Notice to Rams: We're Still No. 32!

All those Jim Zorn haters out there ought to rev up their engines again. They ought to bang down Redskins owner Dan Snyder's door and demand that Zorn get the ziggy. In fact, the entire Redskins team ought to wear scarlet letters on their uniforms: "L," both for Loser and for Lions.

How any team can lose to the garbage that is the Detroit Lions is beyond me.

Someday, one of the current Redskins will pen an autobiography and he'll let us in on the secret. Surely it must have been an effort, willful and with malice, designed to get the coach fired.

No way could the Redskins have actually given it their all and still come up short against the Lions, as they did back on September 27 at Ford Field.

But they did, and for that the 'Skins ought to change their names to the Washington Red-faces.

How can you even report to work every week, knowing you've lost to the Lions?

Once again, football wasn't played by the Lions yesterday against the St. Louis Rams. It was committed. Poorly. Kind of like those guys they catch on videotape on those "World's Dumbest Criminals" TV shows.

The Rams won it, 17-10, and that score wasn't reached how you would think. It was 3-2, Rams, in the bottom of the seventh before it turned into a slugfest of sorts.

So two very long losing streaks have been snapped this year at FF: the Lions' 19-gamer, and the Rams' 17-game version, which had only begun to pick up some national media momentum before it all came crashing down on Sunday.

Now all we're left with is the Tampa Bay Bucs and their measly little 0-7 start. Hmph.

Ah, but fear not, because by the time the curtain closes on this season, the Lions may be doing a revival of their wildly successful 2008 tour and finish 1-15 with a 13-game losing streak in their hip pockets.

It could happen. Don't tell me that it can't.

Don't come at me with the Browns game at Detroit on November 22. And especially don't you dare try to sing me the tired, "The Lions rise to the occasion on Thanksgiving Day" ditty, either.

Look at the schedule and tell me where you see another Lions victory after the ostrich egg they laid on the Ford Field fake grass against the Rams.

When the Rams, no less, talk about you afterward as if they had just taken candy from a baby, it's time for some serious reflection.

The subject was the fake field goal the Rams pulled with about a minute to go in the second quarter, lining up for a 54-yard try.

This is the kicker, Josh Brown, talking:

"When they set up in that certain position with a two-man push (on their right side) they always come hard. Every single time,'' Brown said. "We really knew what they were going to do and we capitalized. We called it on the sideline because we figured what they were going to do. We had watched tape and they came every single time when they were set up that way. It was ours for the taking.''

Wow. It's not bad enough that the haven't-won-for-over-a-year Rams beat the Lions, they have to talk like it was so easy?

The Lions couldn't stop Rams RB Steven Jackson, who ran wild for 149 yards on just 22 carries. That's a Jim Brown/Barry Sanders-like 6.8 yards per carry, if you're scoring at home.

The Lions were without star receiver Calvin Johnson (knee), and so the rest of the receiving corps must have decided to not play, either, in protest.

Poor Matthew Stafford. The rookie QB worked like the dickens to get his sore knee ready after missing two games, and his pass catchers treat him like Isiah Thomas did Michael Jordan in the 1985 All-Star Game?

The Lions receivers spoiled more passes than a pretty girl in a room full of nerds.

Through 45 minutes of play, the Lions had exactly zero catches from their wide receivers. Not that Stafford didn't try; they just kept dropping them.

By the end, Stafford gave up and didn't bother to throw the ball anywhere near them. That'll teach 'em!

It reminds me of an old line by that cut-up coach of the early Bucs, John McKay, who said after another loss, "Well, we didn't block. But we made up for it by not tackling."

The Lions dropped passes, but Stafford made up for it by being inaccurate.

The final "drive" was tragically comical.

The Lions started on their own 20 and ended at their own 10, four incomplete passes later.

The cozy little crowd at FF did their best to rain boos down on Stafford and the Lions, but even that was mostly pathetic.

This was a "message" game and the Lions delivered, big time.

We're STILL the worst, you St. Louis Rams---and don't you forget it!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

"We're not doing anything now except making everyone laugh."

-Jason Hanson, 2008

Call me foolish, I still think we'll win one more game, of course I said that all last year, too. Consider this: If not for the weak victories over the Chiefs in 2007 and the 'Skins in 2009, we'd be riding a 33 game losing streak. Mind boggling.

I don't think we laid that big of an egg against the Rams. It was close. The Packers game was another story. Shades of last season. We have our remaining two worst opponents over the next three weekends. If we can't win one of these, then we may be looking at 1-15.